Trick or Treat!! =)

Jenn, at Munchkin Land posted this!! How funny!! =) Come on, you know that you want to laugh! Thanks, Jenn! =)

and, with that, I am hopefully through blogging today!! Have a great weekend and Happy Halloween!! =)

JULIE

Classes For Men!!

I really needed this laugh today!! My sister sent me this and I just had to share!! =)


Classes for Men at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED By Friday, August 17th 2008

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at
7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's
noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.


*Have a nice day!!!!!!! =)

Things I have learned living in Texas...

Well, I don't exactly live IN Texas but might as well. In about 20 minutes you are at the Texas State line. My Dad's family is from Texas and other parts of the deep South. We are so close to Texas that everything in this list applies to where we live, as well. Enjoy this as much as I did! :o)

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas .

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live inTexas, plus a couple no one's seen before.

4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.

6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

7. 'Jawl-P?' means 'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?'

8. People actually grow and eat okra.

9. 'Fixinto' is one word.

10. There is no such thing as 'dinner'. There is breakfast, lunch and supper.

11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.


12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'

13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'

14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.

16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?'

17. You measure distance in minutes - e.g. 'it's down yonder about 3 minutes past that fillin station'.

18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.

19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.

20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.

21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.

22. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony's, Tabasco and Ketchup.

23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports and motor sports, and gossip.

24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.


25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'.

26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.

27. Going toWal-Mart is a favorite past time know as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'.

28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather.

29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

30. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.

31. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends and those who just wish they were from Texas.