Slow Fade...

Slow Fade,by: Casting Crowns

Slow Fade:

Be careful little eyes what you see
It’s the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it’s the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It’s a slow fade,
it’s a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

*This song used to be on my playlist. I need to put it back up along with some others. I can never listen to it enough. I pray that those who open their hearts to these words may never forget the truth they hold. Be very careful, very, very, careful. Please.

Love to all,
Julie

sweet note ....

Well, I am supposed to NOT be blogging but I just HAD to share with ya'll this sweet note I got in my mailbox today! (I will try to take a picture of it and post it later). It's the prettiest card with dainty little flowers and this sweet poem from our precious friend & cousin, Melissa!! What a wonderful surprise and encouragement for me! :)

"A person can hear, but a friend listens for the meaning,
A person can look, but a friend sees the heart,
A person can know, but a friend understands your dreams,

Thanks for listening, seeing & understanding!
Thanks for being my friend!"

Well, you're welcome & Thanks so much for being such a wonderful friend, sweetie! LOVE YOU, TOO!!! :)

And, here are the lyrics to the song included in the card (I love music and girl, you know that! You just spoke right to my heart today!)

I Was Made To Praise You by Chris Christensen

"I was made to praise you
I was made to glorify Your name
In every circumstance
To find a chance to thank You
I was made to Love You
I was made to worship at Your feet
And to obey You, Lord
I was made for You"

LOVE those words; so much truth in them. :)

Thanks, Melissa, precious friend, for making my day!!

Bourbon or Rum balls.....

Hi everyone! :) I've been enjoying my break and trying to work out some sort of schedule where I can fit in blogging and it seems that I will probably just be blogging occasionally. I still don't have any clear answers but I know that I have been a better wife and mother when I am less obsessed with the computer! :) So, I just had to share a recipe with you today. It's my favorite time of year and we always have to make Christmas candy! Last week we made these and they are so yummy!! (you have to let them sit awhile so the flavors will meld together and the alcohol won't be overpowering!)

Try these and you will be glad you did!

1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1/2 cup white sugar
3 tablespoons corn syrup
1/2 cup rum
2 1/2 cups crushed vanilla wafers
1 cup chopped walnuts (optional)
1/3 cup confectioners' sugar

Place chocolate chips into a microwave-safe medium bowl. Heat in the microwave for 1 minute, stir and then continue to heat at 20 second intervals, stirring between each, until melted and smooth. Stir in sugar and corn syrup. Blend in rum. Add crushed vanilla wafers and chopped nuts. Mix until evenly distributed. Cover and refrigerate until firm.
Roll the chilled chocolate mixture into bite-size balls. Roll balls in a mixture of ground nuts and confectioner's sugar, or just plain confectioner's sugar. Store in a covered container for a week before serving to blend the flavors.

Happy Birthday, Sweet Kylie!!!!

Today is my niece Kylie's birthday!!!!! I tried to have the baby on her birthday (it's what she wanted for a present) but I couldn't sweetie, So sorry!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS!!!!

OUR SWEET

KYLIE RAELENE !!!

We love you, Kylie-bear,

Uncle Charlie, Aunt Julie, Claire, Lily & Baby Drew

Menu Plan Monday

We are on the countdown to getting ready for the baby so I am trying to be very disciplined and stay on budget with everything! Menu planning will help SO much! Here's the game plan for this week:

Monday-

Breakfast: Monkey Bread with pecans

Lunch: PB&J or Cheese & crackers

Supper: Julie's 15 minute Beef Stroganoff ; Steamed broccoli & cauliflower with Smart Balance; iced tea

Tuesday-

Breakfast: Homemade Granola, milk, fruit

Lunch: PB&J or Grilled Cheese

Supper: Loaded Baked Potatoes (bacon bits, sour cream, butter, leftover steamed broccoli & cauliflower, cheese, salt & pepper)

Wednesday-

Breakfast: Starbuck's Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffins

Lunch: Bacon Egg & Cheese Toaster Sandwiches

Supper: Baked Mac & Cheese, Steamed Veggies

Thursday- dr.'s appointment

Breakfast: Cereal, milk, juice, bananas

Lunch: will probably eat lunch in town

Supper: Asian Beef Wraps(I couldn't get the link to work right so the recipe is listed at the bottom); Salad; jello with fruit

Friday-

Breakfast: Cereal, milk, juice, bananas

Lunch: leftovers

Supper: Ham, Cheesy Potaoes (crockpot), green beans, jello with fruit

Saturday-

Breakfast: Pancakes & Bacon & eggs

Lunch: leftovers

Supper: Chicken & Dressing,(I have the cooked chicken, the broth and bread in the freezer), mashed potatoes, green beans,sweet potatoes, jello with fruit

Sunday-

Breakfast: Bacon Egg & Cheese Toasters

Lunch: Charlie's idea; it's Sunday! =)

Supper: Baked Potato Soup, Sweet Onion Muffins

Dessert of the week: Blackberry Cheese Pie (We LOVE this & have SO many blackberries to use up!)

Asian Beef Wraps

6 spinach tortillas
roast beef thinly sliced
cucumber, thinly sliced into sticks
mayonnaise
1 bag instant rice, cooked
soy sauce
green onions, thinly sliced

Cook the instant rice according to package. Add some soy sauce, about 1 or 2 tbsps, depending on your taste. Add the green onions and mix well.Spread mayonnaise on a tortilla.Top with some of the rice mixture. What I do is score the rice into equal sections so that every wrap has the same amount.Layer 3 slices of roast beef and then some cucumber sticks. Fold burrito style. Repeat with remaining tortillas!

Head over to OrgJunkie for more menu ideas!!

Have a great week!!

My New Camera and THANKS!!!

I have been needing a new camera for quite some time and just haven't wanted to spend the money and things just always seemed to come up where I couldn't buy it right then. Well, thanks to some generous family members (who wish to remain anonymous)I thought I would buy a new digital camera so that I could take all the pictures we want and do videos of the kids, as well! So, here is what I got! It's not a very expensive one but it will definitely work and I am just proud to have it! So, hopefully I can get some really good shots of the kids and post them soon! =)

I wanted to get pink but Charlie will be using it a lot when Drew arrives so I didn't want him to have to carry around a pink camera! LOL. =)

I just wanted to share my happy camera news with you and thank you SO much to the anonymous camera fund donors!!!

Also, a HUGE thank you to Aunt Cheryl , Uncle Greg & kids for the cutest overalls and John Deere boots and the onesies for baby Drew!!! They are PRECIOUS (and I will put a picture up a.s.a.p.) and for the adorable dresses for Claire & Lily !! Thank you so much!! Claire put her dress on over her clothes on the way home Wednesday!! lol. =) Thank you to Allison and Ann for playing with the girls, they really loved it and I enjoyed visiting with you!! Love you, girls!!! =)

Prayers for Granny Darlene

Please pray for my brother-in-law (Paul)'s Mama, Granny Darlene. She was in the hospital Thursday night and last night. I think they are letting her come home but I will have to check on that and update. I am not sure what was wrong but she is having a lot of health problems right now so, please pray for her and her family.

*I set this to post early today but it didn't for some reason. I am sorry that it took so long to get on here. (Sorry Paul & Crystal, we are praying, I promise).

Sunday dinner tomorrow

Hot Water Cornbread (you seriously have got to try this) Greens with bacon(and a splash of hot sauce), blackeye peas cooked with bacon &soft fried potatoes with onion. Yeah, a good ol' true Southern Sunday dinner and CHEAP, if you are feeding your family on a budget (who isn't?). My granny used to make this almost every weekend. Or some variation on this meal. This is some serious good food but you don't want to eat like this every day! (All the bacon, you know). =) Give the hot water cornbread a try and serve it with lots of butter! And if you want to make a to die for dessert, try this recipe of my grandmother's! Let me know how you like it! =)

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!

My little barrel racer...

Claire raced (well, loped, trotted) barrels with her cousin Sarah tonight(This is late Tuesday night and I can't sleep) at my Mom & Dad's roping arena. She did great! She is truly a natural and not afraid at all. Although, Mama is a little bit afraid but I trust Sarah (she's been riding since she was 3 also) and I know first hand that Sarah can handle it. So, GOOD JOB, GIRLS!!!!

When I get a picture of her riding , I will have to post it! I did not bring my camera so I didn't get any this time. :o( I will soon. They ride at least 3 times a week so I will have plenty of chances.

Lily wanted to ride too but she will have to wait awhile until she can ride with me. :o)

Just an update on what my little cowgirls have been up to!!

*Congratulations to our niece Allison on placing 4th out of more than 300 kids at livestock judging camp. And also to Ann Mary for getting to be part of the team and doing so well! GOOD JOB, GIRLS!!!! :o)

Prayers for Aunt Vivalee

Please pray for Charlie's Aunt Vivalee. She has had surgery for an aneurysm and has developed pneumonia. She is almost 80 yrs. old and she's hanging on but really needs a lot of prayer. We do not know at this time how everything will turn out. Your prayers are appreciated.

Happy 60th Birthday, Daddy!!!

*This is a journal thing for me, as well. I just wanted to get this down and print it out and take it to Daddy today. I am turning off comments because I didn't write it for that reason. Feel free to email me if you would like. :o)

Wow, I can't believe that my Dad is 60!! Where does the time go? And, wow, I must say, you do not look 60 years old! (I knew that you would LOVE to hear that).


Daddy, I have SO much to thank you for and SO many things that I have never said that I should have and a lot of things I said that I shouldn't have! Maybe that makes sense. Anyway, thanks for having such great patience with me. :o)



You were the first man ever in my life and you have left such a huge impact on me. I love the way you are such a tender man and still a man of great conviction. Some things were just not negotiable with you and I can truly appreciate that now. I am so grateful for all of your rules that seemed so silly at the time!

You taught me most of all how a man should love his wife above all. You and Mom are definitely not perfect but I always knew how much you love her. You did not allow people to speak bad of Mama or us. You did not allow us to sass Mama in any way. You always backed her up. One of my favorite memories to this day is you and Mama kissing silly to make us laugh. I can still see you two doing that and laughing so hard.

Thank you so much, Daddy, for all of the tickle wars and hugs when I cried. Thank you for sitting with me and holding me when I was sick. Thank you for holding me when I lost my babies. And for not telling me anything, not saying a word, just holding me and letting me cry.

Thank you for loving Charlie so much. Thank you for always supporting him and being his friend. Thank you most of all, for loving us unconditionally, because I know that is not always easy.

Thank you for the junk food you give the girls. Thank you for the visits and buying me pops. Thank you for loving with all you are.

Thank you for trying to teach me to drive (haha), for teaching me all you knew about basketball (A WHOLE LOT), for teaching me to work hard, for talking to me about boys and friends. For telling me just how much I am worth. For being proud of me. For pulling me up when I fall down. For letting me know that it's okay to fall sometimes. God is there to pull you back up and so are you.

Thank you for always telling the girls how smart and pretty they are. For sitting with me in the van before my wedding and letting me see you cry. For telling me how much you love me. For walking me down that aisle to my future husband shaking so hard but holding my hand so tightly. For loving me enough to let me go. For loving and respecting Charlie.


Thank you most of all Daddy, for serving our country when you were drafted. For not being bitter about it to us even though I know that you witnessed a living hell. For fighting for freedom and being seperated from your family and all that you knew and loved for people that you didn't even know in a country that you really could care less about. Yet, you never let it stop you from loving us with all you had.


Well, I guess I should stop now. I just really do love my Dad and it is very hard sometimes to tell him these things. I see now so many things that I should have done and yet didn't. Time is precious and I hope that by writing this and getting it out, I can let him know just how much he means to his family on Earth. God truly blessed me by bringing me into the family that he did. We have our problems, sometimes some big ones, but we are a family and we hold on. That means a lot to me the older that I get.


If you have a Daddy then go hug him. If you don't have a Daddy, remember how very much more that GOD loves you.


*Thank you, God, for my earthly father. Thank you for the guidance and love he has given to me. Please be with him all the remaining days of his life and bless him greatly for his service to you. In Jesus name, Amen.

Words of Wisdom

I wasn't going to post today but my sister posted something that I wanted to share with all of you. Click here and read some words of wisdom on using your Bible. My sister found this in my PawPaw Treat's bible. I can not say enough about my PawPaw. He was an amazing man of God. The impression he left on so many lives was truly remarkable. I miss him so much that I still cry when I think of him. I still have a lot of his things and a lot of his words of wisdom written down that I carry in my heart. Please click here and read, I believe that it may help you today or sometime.

Also, I am going to take a blogging break this week. See you soon!

Love and Prayers,
Julie

Crockpot Lasagna

This is an easy recipe that I found on another blog but my computer won't let me link back to it so I am going to post the version I made because I changed a few things! (Like usual, huh?) This is SO good and SO easy and there is no boiling heat in your kitchen from the oven!! Which is nice because currently it is 97 degrees outside with 95% humidity. Wow. Living in the South in the summer is for sure, HOT & HUMID which equals sticky!!! My hair is currently sticking to the back of my neck but it will only get worse when it is 105-110 degrees in August. It will happen. It always does. Anyway, here's the recipe for Lasagna in the crock pot!

Julie's Crock pot Lasagna

2 lbs. ground beef or turkey (I use turkey)
2 good shakes of dried minced onion (about a TBSP)
2 TBSP. Italian seasoning (I use Tone's Spicy Spaghetti from Sam's)
1 box lasagna noodles
2 jars of Spaghetti Sauce (we use Prego or Del Monte) reserve 1/2 cup
2 cans mushrooms, drained (optional)
1 15 oz. container cottage cheese
1 egg
salt & pepper
2 cups mozzarella cheese, shredded
1/3 c. water

Place some sauce in bottom of crock pot. Place a few broken up lasagna noodles on top. Brown meat, onions & Italian seasoning in skillet. Drain. Add sauce(except for 1/2 cup) & mushrooms to meat. Place meat sauce on top of lasagna noodles. Mix cheese & egg & salt & pepper in a small bowl. Place a layer on top of meat sauce. Add more broken up lasagna noodles. Continue layering until you end with noodles and reserved 1/2 cup sauce on top. Add 1/3 cup water. Cook on low for 5 hrs.

*If this is not clear just let me know! I tried but it's hard to remember exact measurements! Most of the time I just add a little of this and that. Anyway, hope you enjoy this & maybe it will save you from suffering a heat stroke while cooking for your family!

We usually eat this with a simple salad (we are getting tomatoes, cucumbers and peppers and salad greens out of the garden right now) and tonight I am slicing some fresh cold cantaloupe to eat for dessert!

*Update: Our pool is here!! Charlie is working on getting it set up right now!! I can't wait to go swimming and cool off!!! Drew is running out of room and I am getting very uncomfortable!!

Have a wonderful weekend & a Happy Sunday!!

Love,
Julie

His Yoke is Easy, His Burden is Light

Philippians 4:13 (New International Version)

13I can do everything through him who gives me strength.


This is a verse I have memorized before when I was pregnant with Lily and in the hospital and scared to death that I would die from the complications I was having and I would have to leave Charlie & Claire. I did not know how long I would have to be in the hospital or how long it would take me to get better or if I would. But, I read my bible as much as I could with the IV's in my arm and this is one of the verses I leaned on the most.

Today, I am feeling a lot better about things. Coming through a lot of YUCK! A lot of worry. Things are not necessarily better but I realize just how much I have been giving Satan a stronghold in my life but allowing him in my mind. He has convinced me that I am not capable of handling anything. When in reality, I am capable of handling EVERYTHING that comes my way because I have the Lord who is my true stronghold.

I have always been full of self doubt. I am very hard on myself and I tend to dwell on my mistakes. Lately I have been thinking how I can't possibly handle a third child. I make so many mistakes with the two I have! How on earth is this going to work? And, I beat myself up all the time for the things that I don't do or don't do right with the girls. I think that I am the most terrible mother ever. And the biggie? I don't think that I deserve my babies. I don't believe that I deserve my husband. I am a failure. The list could go on and on forever. I get in this pit, this self incriminating, destructive mindset and I stay there and live in self pity. Because it is comfortable to me. It's easier to believe in others than to believe in myself.

But, today, God has given me this WORD and I must soak this in and Pay Attention to what HE is telling me. I CAN DO THIS!!!!! I am a good mother. I am a good wife. I can be all these things through Christ. And, that my friends, is the biggest relief of the huge burden I have been carrying! So, today, I am letting God carry it for me. For "His yoke is easy, His burden is light."

Hope ya'll have a wonderful day!

Random stuff

Charlie took the girls to visit his parents last night. I stayed home to rest although I actually got more done than I do if the girls are with me. lol. Right now, ALL the laundry is done, the floors are clean and the clutter is picked up and put in its place. It feels GOOD.

I have been so full of anxiety lately and Charlie has constantly told me to "be still" and let God work. Just keep on praying and let his peace sustain me. This has been difficult to do not only because I am nearing the end of my pregnancy (with no new OB, so far) but also because of family situations. But, God has started this work, he knows the reasons for these events and circumstances. I MUST trust.

So, cleaning did a good work in me. I feel less stressed even with maybe 4 hrs. sleep last night snatched here and there! Claire was up about every hour, I don't know why. She has been sleeping in the same room as Sissy and I am finding it a lot different and less peaceful than when they are seperated! Bless you, Mom, for all the sleepless nights that Crystal and I gave you! SO sorry! lol.

Anyway, just feeling better but still struggling to be peaceful about all that is going on right now. Thank you to those who have been praying for me and my family. We really do need and appreciate it.

Charlie gave the lesson at church yesterday and it was over, can you guess? "Be Still and Know that I am God". One of my very favorite passages and I LOVE the way my husband always knows just what to say when I need him to say it. Thank you so much, baby.

I also mentioned a while back that I have some family that graduated this year and things happened and I never got around to congratulating them (on my blog) so here goes:

Congratulations to high school graduates:

*Garett Burns
*Jesse Phipps
*Michael Rogers
*Jake Morgan
*Amber Bunn

If I forgot anyone I am sorry, truly did not mean too!

Well, I have to go get off the computer and do something productive today to stay awake. I think the girls and I may go for a walk in awhile although it is supposed to be in the high 90's with like 97% humidity!!! I will be SO happy when we get our pool and get in it!!! :o)

*Also, please continue to pray for my swelling in my legs and feet. Thank you.

Love and Prayers to all & Have a wonderful week!

Julie

A pregnancy update & the power of prayer

This is a 4D ultrasound photo of a baby boy at 30 weeks. It's not Drew but I just thought it was neat to look at! I wish that we could do that but probably won't get to with this one. We have a 3D of Lily but not one of Claire(they were not performing 3D's yet). Lily's looks just like her & it would be neat to see how Drew looks but that's okay, we can wait! :o)

So, an update on my pregnancy, I am SO tired! My legs and feet are really swelling up and my hands and face do sometimes. I don't have toxema (that we know of), it's just a lot of fluid! The doctor is a little concerned about all of the fluid, especially in my legs because of family history with phlebitis. So, we are keeping an eye on that.

Other than the swelling & just being tired, I am doing pretty good. :o) Just anxious to see our son! But not too soon! We want him to be strong and healthy.

I can't really tell you how much I have gained because I actually don't know! I kept track of it religiously with the girls but haven't been able to with this one! But, that's okay, I am still well within normal range and I am not too worried about it as I tend to lose it fast when I need to. I will just up the healthy eating & exercise another notch after Andrew arrives. Which actually, I am looking forward to getting more exercise. I am wanting a double stroller so that we can take long walks and I am actually wanting to take up running again after the baby comes so we will see how that goes.

On another less happy note, I want to ask all of you who read this to pray hard for my family right now. There are a lot of circumstances I can't go into but we all need prayer very much at this time. I can give you a few specifics so here goes:

*My mom & dad for strength and wisdom to deal with circumstances that directly involve them but are completely out of their control. (sorry so vague)

* My sister, Tammy, her husband George, and their children: Jesse, Michael, Sarah & Rose. Just that God will intervene and cover them with HIS love and peace. For wisdom and strength.

*For our church family, wisdom, courage & strength.

* My Uncle Edwin who is undergoing chemo right now and is not taking it very well, physically. He is fighting his 3rd round with pancreatic cancer.

*For Charlie, me, my sister, Crystal, her husband Paul and our children, strength and courage and wisdom to say things we need to say in love and not anger.

*For my state of mind as we prepare for the birth of our little Drew. God's peace to be with us.

Thank you SO much and please let me know if I can pray for you in anyway at all. Thank you to all of those who have offered to help in various ways, you are truly wonderful! :o)

Praising God for the glorious people HE has placed in our lives.

*Updated: My OB, Dr. Dwain Doyle has died. Please keep his family in your prayers. Also, please pray that we may find a wonderful doctor to replace the amazing doctor that we had. You will be missed, Dr. Doyle. He was a wonderful man who loved children and life. And for those of you who subscribe to my blog posts, I am so sorry about all of the edits! I have to keep fixing it because I was crying when I typed it.

Love and Prayers,

Julie

Our Lily

I haven't done this for either of the girls in a while so I thought that I would brag on Lily Charlotte today! Here's what she is up to!

*LOVES fresh garden tomatoes!!!

*weighs 25 lbs!!!

*says, "what dat?" & "dat ent bye-bye" (What's that & that went bye-bye)

*EATS anything you put in front of her

*LOVES shrimp

*lays on her bedroom floor & "talks" on the phone to Daddy

*"sings" herself to sleep

*throws the wildest tantrums I have ever seen

*says "yay" and claps when Claire gets through praying at meals

*pats my back when I hold her

*rubs my arm when she is sleepy

*LOVES Boscoe (the dog) and Joe (the cat)

*tells them to "mere" (come here)

*LOVES her sippy cup and drinks water all the time

*Has the most beautiful smile with her two bottom teeth & her gums

* Is VERY sensitive

*Does the "Miss America" wave when Daddy comes home :o)

* One of her favorite things is to fingerpaint & color with Sissy

* She has to have kisses from all of us before she can settle down for the night.

*She is 14 months old today; HAPPY 14 months, SWEET LILY BEAR!!!

Love,

Mama, Daddy, Sissy & Baby Drew

*I have more recent pictures of Claire & Lily to upload, I just haven't had the time to get it done. Hopefully this week!

Marriage & Prayers

Marriage is hard sometimes yes, but right now, I know that there is NO place I would rather be than with my baby. Charlie is my rock. He is the best thing God has ever granted me. He is my strength. He loves me despite my flaws and sees the best in me. God LOVES marriage. God has ordained our marriage to be sacred and right now I am ever more reminded that I MUST work all the harder to keep my marriage vows sacred and untouched by the enemy.

If you can would you please say a prayer for me tonight? It's not about my marriage but I have some things going on right now that I need strength for. I also ask specific prayers for my sister & my brother in law & their children tonight. Please ask that the Lord would equip me with the strength, knowledge & peace to be the help I need to be. To say the right things. That the Lord would help them find strength and peace in HIM.

Right now, I am off to bed to hold my husband close & thank God for him.

Love and Prayers to all,
Julie

Monday, Monday

Not much going on today. The girls are playing in their room, destroying it, I am sure! :o) My legs are swelling so I can't get much accomplished today. I am just doing laundry and playing with the girls. I have some chicken in the crockpot for chicken salad tonight & enough leftovers for tomorrow. I am going to serve it with crescent rolls & sliced fruit. Yummy & Easy!

Charlie talked to his dad last night and he is really excited about going to his 50 yr. class reunion in Maine. He is also really excited about his 12th grandchild coming soon! He is such a sweet dear man. The girls have been coloring & fingerpainting like crazy for their grandparents lately. It's really cute. :o)

My Mom & Dad were married 40 years on Saturday! WOW! Time really flies and I just realized yesterday that my Dad will be 60 on July 22. 60! How can that be?! :o)

So, anyway, just stuff going on around here. I am hoping that staying off of my feet will keep the swelling down. Hopefully!

Thanks for reading & Have a great week! =0)

Love,
Julie

I Know the Plans I Have For You

Ephesians 3:20 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,

I love this verse! It always speaks to me in times of distress or doubt. I have been going through a lot of both lately and as always this verse has brought me back to the feet of my Lord. What a beautiful precious place to be.

This verse has carried me through a lot of hard times in my life and I use it on almost a daily basis. Sometimes it is the prayer I say under my breath through out the day when life seems to overwhelm me. The words of the Spirit just grant me a peace that I really can't explain or comprehend. When we went through so much pain with infertility, this verse is often what Charlie and I read before bed at night. There are others, of course. But, I believe this is the verse that really sustained me through that painful time. And, each time I prepare to have another baby I focus on these words. It helps calm the storm in my heart. Something about these words just erases all fear.

Lately I have been doubting myself, my actions, my purpose that God has called me to. Satan has been very active in trying to control my mind and thoughts. I am by nature, a worrier. Everyone that knows me, knows that! :o) It has been extremely hard to overcome this flaw. I am still fighting that uphill battle but lately I am feeling the power within me is greater than the force that is trying to drag me down.

I have been praying through this all week as we have dealt with various trials. This morning as the girls finally feel better and we feel somewhat normal (what a horrible stomach bug), Charlie and I were drinking coffee and discussing what we need to accomplish before Drew arrives and also just basic plans for today. All of a sudden while talking through things with my husband, I realized just how much control I have been allowing Satan to have over my mind! I rebel at the thought of relinquishing control of even one tiny aspect of my life. That is a very sobering thing to realize about yourself. However, I must face this battle head on. I DO NOT have control of my life, nor should I even try. The battle belongs to the Lord. My job is to praise and follow HIM with every fiber of my being, with everything that is within me! The very idea that I can control my life is an idea that spawns from the enemy. Yes, I can make decisions from my own free will but I cannot control the circumstances that evolve from those decisions! I cannot control the plans that my God has for me and my family. We are only to pray to make the best decisions and to serve our Lord God with all of our ability!

Even now, as I type this, Satan is pressing in and trying to convince me that nothing will ever change, that God does not care about me, that HE is not with me! And, I know, without a doubt, that is the biggest lie ever from the Father of ALL LIES!!! God will pull me through and carry me throughout all of my trials and struggles! I am the one who often pulls away in my doubt.

Thank you for reading my novel today and for praying for my family this past week. It really means so much to me. Thank you for standing in the gap for me when I need someone the most!

I hope this helped someone today and even if it didn't, it really helped me to get it out and Satan has been defeated through yet another struggle!!!

Jeremiah 29:11 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.